Distress             Surprise               Excitement

      Bummed               Creepy               Satisfaction

1. Florence ADMAX (CO)

The nation’s worst people live in Colorado - in this prison, that is. The security’s so tight, they won’t even let food in. The inmates have to eat each other. It’s bad.

2. Canaan (PA)

The biblical name could not be more appropriate. This sin-filled Babel has housed more sodomies than all other facilities in the nation combined.

3. Lompoc (CA)

This is where most bikers go. If you enjoy meth, like to kill, and own a hog, you’ll probably end up here.

4. Big Sandy (KY)

Don’t let the name fool you - this is no beach. In fact, this place houses sea-faring offenders like the guy who killed his entire submarine crew and ate them. He crashed onto a beach, though.

5. Atlanta (GA)

The Dirty South’s dirtiest. When people call Atlanta a prison, this may actually be what they’re talking about. This is where Jermaine Dupri recruits rappers.