Another year, another fantasy baseball rompin’ by me. In a 10-team league, I managed to snag the following excellent lineup, with position rankings:
C: Mauer, Joe – 2nd - Time to shine
1B: Pujols, Albert – 1st - Cash money millionaires
2B: Jose Vidro – ?? - Solid pickup, thanks.
3B: Chávez, Eric – 9th - Better make up for last year
SS: Reyes, Jose – 3rd - SB king. How appropriate.
OF: Abreu, Bobby – 4th - All-around fantasy pimp.
OF: Wells, Vernon – 20th - Solid stats, but so, so boring
OF: Tracy, Chad – 25th - Up & coming D’back stud
Util: Howard, Ryan – 35th - 22 HRs in 312 ABs. Look out!
Bench: Morneau, Justin – 17th – (who cares?)
Bench: Giles, Marcus – 5th or 6th - Trying to trade this punk
SP: Zambrano, Carlos – 8th - Big baby bull is a machine
SP: Buehrle, Mark – 15th - IPs and CGs all day, every day
SP: Beckett, Josh – 23rd - What’s left to say?
DL: SP: Lowry, Noah – 25th - Young and underrated. Like me.
SP: Capuano, Chris – 40th - 18 Ws and good K’s
RP: Street, Huston – 7th - Young gun rolled last year
RP: Fuentes, Brian – 17th - Still good, despite Colorado
DL: RP: Jones, Todd – 18th - 40 saves last year in Florida
RP: Valverde, José – 23rd - Solid ERA, K/BB ratio
RP: Burgos, Ambiorix – ? – Just got the KC closer job
RP: Papelbon, Jon – 1st so far – Don’t even go there.
RP: Villarreal, Oscar – ?! - Yeah, sure.
RP: Worrell, Tim – 2nd so far – Stacked with closers now.
Update: 5/18/06: My team is completely different now; I traded Pujols for Thome and Santana, then Thome for Mulder, put Howard at 1B, picked up Uggla, Tomko, Putz, Morneau is gone, and i’m currently .5 GB first.
Dopetastic. However, I think I gotcha one better. In my main league, check out the lineup of the defending champ, “Hebrew Hammers”
C – Mauer (if he’s healthy all year, watch out)
1B – Howard (lotsa hype, but will live up to it this year)
2B – Cantu (Ugly as sin, but the stats don’t lie)
SS – Lugo (speed and average; good thing they don’t take off points for errors)
3B – Beltre (ripe for a monster comeback)
CI – Blaylock (needed “the hammer”)
MI – CHONE MUTHAFUCKIN’ FIGGINS
OF – Freel (speedster galore, plus he knows how to have a good time)
OF – Manny (no comment needed)
OF – Damon (a traitor, sure, but TONS of run scoring potential, and he’s never on the DL)
OF – Alou (old, but still has it)
OF – Brady Clark (underrated as hell)
Util – Mike Sweeney (everyone forgets about him, but still puts up numbers)
Bench – Ibanez and Shelton (meh)
P- Peavy (NL Cy Young winner – calling it now)
P – C. Zambrano (baby bull – another possible Cy candidate)
P – Nathan (top-3 closer)
P – Patterson (unsung stud)
P – Wickman (gettin’ older, but still puts up numbers; will have tons of save opps if healthy)
P – Valverde (see above)
P – Ray (O’s closer – has been lights out in spring training)
P – Livan H. (innings eater – general eater overall)
P – Scott Shields (super-nasty all purpose reliever)
Bench – E. Santana, A. Benitez and D. Weathers (super rookie and two closers; not too shabby for bench warmers)
Damn, dude, Chonious is money in the bank, and Peavy/Zambrano rule the NL. Eff Pedro.
I think Flozie just jinxed the sh*t out of Damon. The Yankees newest center fielder is now in for a long season of rehabing a torn ACL! Hah Hah (a la Nelson!)
Ruds…didn’t you almost die once playing wiffleball?
Hiester, didn’t you almost die once when Mason and Christos went “Brokeback” on you a couple of years ago?
Didn’t Mason and Skos run a train on a Johnny Damon blow-up doll once?
Ruds, we broke the Guinness world record for biggest man-sandwich. Glory has it’s price. Besides, I’ve been able to sit comfortably for at least a month now.
How’s your eight-year old asian sister doing?