Friday

William Bennett makes most racist comment ever

not a fan of black people or somethingHe’s completely unapologetic about it, too. He seems to think that it’s fine and dandy that he proposed such a ridiculous scenario, and proved that it is, indeed, ridiculous. He doesn’t quite see that the fact that coming up with such a scenario in his mind and suggesting the context is what makes him blatantly racist.

It’s like if we shot every person who can wiggle their ears to solve America’s weight problem.

Judge orders release of Abu Ghraib photos

Awesome. I bet there are some really messed-up pics coming our way. Military perversions are by far the worst of all perversions, as we’ve seen.

Texas Judge Orders Teen Barred From Sex

I hope all of the Roe v. Wade protesters show up and start up another “get out of my vagina” type of fracas.

Eviction Escape: Man Flees, 200-lb. Pig Attacks

What a great bodyguard. Even if he took a bullet for you, you’d have a whole bunch of breakfast meats on your hands. In other news, I could go for some hash browns right now.

Posted on by chris Posted in News

9 Responses to Friday

  1. ClamBaker5000

    William Bennett and Ann Coulter, who are both Fox News contributors, are having a bet on who could say the most appalling thing and get away with it..
    Coulter, in the past, called for invading the Mecca and ending Islam.. A move that she thought would clearly seal a victory. But Bennett has indeed one upped her.

  2. chris

    Coulter has already planned a rebuttal, with reports circulating that she will claim that “cancer is God’s way of getting rid of Asians”

    P.S. yo, clambake, is there anything going on at the 9er tonight?

  3. ClamBaker5000

    I can’t see why there shouldn’t be anything going on… we have a stripper arriving at the airport at midnight…and by a stripper, I mean Ben’s mother. But, we can always play pong.

  4. chris

    Will Ben’s mom do her dirty pong ball-shooting trick for us?

  5. ClamBaker5000

    yes.. but despite the surgeon general’s warnings, if she gets one into your cup you do have to drink the beer.
    Despite what you may believe, your stomach acids will NOT be able to kill those crabs.

  6. chris

    those weren’t crabs, those were straight-up lobsters. what a dirty, dirty lady.

  7. ClamBaker5000

    The Denver Lobster Crustaceous Elwayus is very foul. It is an ill-tempered disease bag.

  8. DeepFryer6000

    Oh i should point out that if you do want to play Beirut, only Amy and myself may be around to drink as Marc is in Maine, and ben is picking up the stripper from the airport at midnight… so you will need to bring your roomate and your gay trucker sidekick or some skanky cum silo you find on the streets of Allston or someone else..

  9. chris

    I hear ya. I dunno what Dreadlock’s plans are, but I’ll give you a call later tonight once I figure all this shit out

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