After decades of travelling the countryside entertaining kids and spreading cheer, Naked Zorro has finally hit rock bottom, as he crashed his El Camino into a daycare while covered head-to-toe in Native American war paint. After the wreck, he got out of the car the car and started doing a Margaret Thatcher imitation, which none of the 4- and 5-year olds found funny. “Not even a chuckle,” one witness recalled.
The Colby College graduate says he’ll quit comedy and return to his career in public relations in Cambridge, MA, where he said he’ll test out more Naked Zorro material.
9-Year-Old Girl Fatally Stabbed 11-Year-Old
According to Diva, the girl who stabbed Queen was a “thug”. How does a 9-year-old girl become a thug? By listening to Snow.
Nader Says Dubya Should Be Impeached
He’s got a good argument for a Ralph Nader argument. Relatively, this makes more sense than most things he’s proposed before, including kicking Illinois out of the Union and making paper clips illegal.
Christian Slater Accused of Groping Old Woman
The alleged target of his bootygrab was a 52-year-old gal who wasn’t flattered by being fondled by the “Heathers” and “Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves” star. Slater insists that it’s a conspiracy, and that he’s going to sue everyone. Little did he know that patting a butt is not illegal, but grabbing it is. Apparently I put that PSA out for nothing.
My manhood will be making an in-house appearance at the 5-9 this evening, from 830-845pm. Be there, bitches!
Comment by Naked Zorro — June 1, 2005 @ 3:41 pm