Rusty Wallace flips Tony Danza’s go-kart in race
At the “DayTony 500″, aka the “GayTony 500″, Tony Danza and NASCAR star Rusty Wallace were enjoying a milkshake together when they started arguing about symptoms of irritable bowel syndrome. A fight nearly broke out between the two when Danza made a comment about Wallace’s mother having IBS, and Wallace vowed to “take it out on the track”.
Around the third turn of the first lap, Wallace rammed Danza, causing the daytime TV star’s car to flip over. Danza’s head was nearly severed in the crash, and as his crumpled car rolled over his near-lifeless body, Wallace sped by yelling, “Who’s the boss, now, bitch?!”
Chlamydia strikes penguin colony
A massive group of about 10,000 penguins in Antarctica have been stricken with an outbreak of chlamydia. Scientists have traced the STD back to a researcher from Vermont, who was on a six-month expedition in the South Pole to study penguins’ sexual drives. The researcher, who is now back in Boston, says “whatever happens in Anarctic penguin sex dens, stays in Antarctic penguin sex dens.”
Loophole may allow Idaho/Wyoming crime spree
If I could somehow convince the judges on American Idol that there’s a big American Idol cookout in Idaho next weekend, both my bloodthirst and my desire to end the phenomenon will be quenched.
Homers down 8.8% in first 5 weeks of ‘05
Expert Analysis: But Los Angeles Angels bench coach Joe Maddon, who has been in professional baseball since 1975, thinks testing “could be tied to it somehow.”
It takes a guy who’s been in baseball for 30 years to make a bold statement like that?
