F*cking villagers vote against name change
this gives me an idea. when a new town gets started up, i think the naming rights should be sold by auction, pending approval of course.
perhaps the name can only be sold for a period of 5 or 10 years, and then re-sold. this way, you will probably get a controversial name, via a controversial process, and make money off it. it’s the american way.
Man charged with chalupa assault
is there anything worse than living in iowa and having the last name “lame”?
and uh, then getting arrested for assault by taco?
and then getting out of jail, and realizing that you still live in iowa and your last name is still “lame”?
clearly this man’s tragic life is the fault of all the taco violence shown on the nightly news, k-mart, and the huge chalupa-producing contracts the defense department gives out.
Belgian hot dog wholesaler used dog meat
thankfully the hot dogs were only distributed in europe, where they’re used to having various random contents in their food. i’m sure this has happened in america though, too. a dog here, a goat there, who knows what falls into those giant vats of hot dog slurry?
American hot dogs have SHARKS in them! Warn the publik!
Comment by gnutz — June 8, 2004 @ 10:06 am
Actually, the #1 ingredient in American hot dogs is, in fact, shark remains.
Nurse sharks, hammerheads, and lobster sharks provide the earthy flavor of the ballpark frank.
Tiger shark and great white meat are found in the softer, milder store-brand hot dogs.
Use of shark remains been widely publicized and commercially successful since the advent of the American hot dog industry.
anyone want to meet me at Spike’s for dinner?
Comment by chris — June 8, 2004 @ 10:42 am
Hey…now that you mention it…
Isn’t Spike’s really named
Spike’s JUNKYARD DOGS(!)
Treachery is afoot! I want my shark meat, damnit!
Comment by gnutz — June 8, 2004 @ 11:33 am
If it is Tuesday The Greek, should i have the day off, or get lots of free stuff?
Comment by SnackMaster3000 — June 8, 2004 @ 11:40 am
So they actually feed dogs to dogs?! “The Federal Food Agency in Belgium has confirmed the meat used in the hot dogs was intended for use in the dog food industry.”
WHAT!?!?!?!?
Comment by The Hamburglar — June 8, 2004 @ 2:01 pm
Hey hold on a sec….
If you read the article I think they are saying “dog meat” when they mean “meat for dogs to eat.” As in dog grade meat, not meat made of dogs. Still gross, but not nearly as interesting.
Now give me my shark cartilage, damnit!
Comment by gnutz — June 8, 2004 @ 2:18 pm
so yeah, i suppose that the meat in the hot dogs was actually “dog grade meat” but it’s my sensationalist nature to report otherwise.
plus, i’m sure an actual dog has gotten into the slurry vats before
Comment by chris — June 8, 2004 @ 2:53 pm
mmm…slurry
Comment by Flozie — June 8, 2004 @ 4:21 pm