Manchas The Jaguar Strikes Again

talk about insult to injury. some dude gets his finger bitten off by ol Manch and gets tossed from the world-famously crappy Albuquerque zoo for LIFE for getting that finger bitten off.

the weird thing is, they tracked him down, called him and asked if he was missing a finger, and he said no. but then they fingerprinted the finger and matched it to him. why the hell would you lie about getting your finger bitten off by a famous jaguar? i’d be bragging across the state.

it’s like those BS stories that men tell that they caught a dolphin, or got swallowed by an elephant, but this time it’s true. what a pimp.

Why Do Athletes Pee on Their Hands?

it seems a few baseball players, Moises Alou and Jorge Posada, among others, enjoy peeing on their hands in order to make the skin tough .

i’m not sure if this qualifies as a fetish, but attemping to justify peeing your hands as part of your job is the biggest lie possible. they’re only deceiving themselves and their loved ones.

despite not wanting to talk about this any more, i will, and say that urea is found in skin-softening lotions, which makes it that much more ridiculously embarassing that these guys pee all over themselves for tougher skin.

rumor has it that certain japanese league stars rub themselves in bacon fat to run faster, as the wind slides off them better.

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