in case you’re wondering what i do on my sunday afternoons other than the usual, i tend to order kitchen accessories online:
those are tiny versions of my new cocktail shaker and wine cooler from crate and barrel’s website.
this got me to thinking….as with most aspects of life, there are many stereotypes involved with online shoppers. they are typically easy to categorize, based on their superficial qualities and level of bias that i have for them. they were arranged into five separate but equal categories:
the guy who orders his deviant sex equipment from a computer lab:
the guy who orders furniture online to make shopping online more comfortable:
sketchy guy who doesnt order anything, but sees what sketchy stuff you order, you naughty fop:
old woman who’d sooner burn in hell than spend a dime at oldnavy.com:
stupid but hot chick who thinks she just met a new “28/M/investment banker” but actually just sponsored a new gang of chechen rebels:
the 28/m/Bank Investor… tends to be JR, who also poses a 14/f/44DD for “research purposes”
Comment by Snackmaster3000 — March 22, 2004 @ 12:22 pm
JR keeps having a group of middle school girls over for sleepovers.
he said it’s part of his “fanclub” whatever that means.
Comment by c4 — March 22, 2004 @ 12:30 pm
I thought he said that they were a troop of Girl Scouts and they were “earning merit badges” ….well, whatever that means….
Comment by Snackmaster3000 — March 22, 2004 @ 12:38 pm
JR just does weird things like that cause he’s a battered spouse
Comment by chris — March 22, 2004 @ 12:44 pm
well i keep saying Scott should stay away from the cheap moonshine and stop slapping JR around but nobody listens to me.
Comment by Snackmaster3000 — March 22, 2004 @ 1:23 pm
Damn you all! Leave me be with my dirty, dirty desires! Oh yeah, and if there’s a gonna be some spousal batterin’, y’all best be watchin yo backs–C4’s gettin’ that Soul Glo mop waxed (much like KY got waxed last night) when he least ’spects it!
-Flozell
Comment by Flozell — March 22, 2004 @ 1:29 pm
Tito’s Homemade Texas Vodka is responsible for the single best and worst moments of Scott’s life.
Let’s just say surgery was required.
Comment by c4 — March 22, 2004 @ 1:47 pm
You know oddly enough jonah does have the yellow lighting in his room so that he looks like the guy in the third picture, although he does not monitor our purchases he just looks at donkey porn.
Comment by Snackmaster3000 — March 22, 2004 @ 2:07 pm
Yo Mamma
Comment by Flozell — March 22, 2004 @ 3:32 pm
on another note … where the hell did you find that pic . shit . mother theresa will be ashamed .
Comment by christy — March 23, 2004 @ 2:30 pm